Catching up. And deaf culture.

I know.

Long time, no see.

I was just going through a hide - underground phase. Didn't feel like writing much. Now I'm back. And I'm rusty.

Anywho. Internship's been going on pretty much as usual and as expected. But most times I really enjoy the contact with various kinds of people it brings for me.

Now just during my last 15 day Ophthalmology posting, all I did was check the visual acuity of the patients in the OPDs. Very boring, you might think? Yeah. I guess. But you know, not really.

It's just fun coming across so many people and all their idiosyncrasies and wondering about their back stories.

And I just love it when a patient comes and wishes me "Good morning Doctor" with a really excited smile. It makes my day.

So, ophthal brought me tons of kids who thought reading out the visual acuity chart correctly was like passing in a school test, old ladies who forced their life stories upon me instead of getting tested, the relatives who tried to prompt to the patients whenever they wouldn't read correctly, the little kid who tried to cheat by peeking through her good eye every single time I asked her to read anything, the proud uncles who were too embarrassed to admit they couldn't see, and the pros who were so used to the testing they just told me up to which line they could read. And of course, the occasional lecherous old men. But yeah.

I pretty much enjoyed the experience. 

But there's one story I'm unlikely to forget. A 17 year old kid came in one day along with his father. He was thin, lanky, and otherwise looked non-descript. Once he took his seat his father informed me that he was deaf. I was mildly surprised, but didn't react. Instead I was pretty much in awe.

*More info required here* So, of late, I have taken to watching a new series called 'Switched at birth'. One of the two protagonists on the show is deaf, and the show also has a lot of other hearing-impaired characters. The show has vastly improved my knowledge and education regarding the community of deaf/hearing-impaired people, acquainted me with the kind of lives they live, and helped me develop an immense respect and greater awareness about them. It also introduced me to what is known as deaf culture, as well as to the ongoing debate in the community regarding cochlear implants.

I have never ever met a deaf /hearing-impaired person earlier in my life. So when I came across this kid, I looked at him in wonder. I know that some deaf people talk aloud, and some don't. He was one who didn't talk aloud. His dad pretty much talked for him. I also noticed that neither of them used sign language, quite unlike what I saw on the show. Neither did the kid seem to know lip-reading. But then again, this was India. So then their problems and the way they live over here and how they deal with it would be totally different. I probably still need a lot more education in this area.

Anyhow, so, back to the story. The kid sat there, a bit confused about how to proceed. I immediately got up, and started pointing out to the boxes I wanted him to read, and he immediately responded by gesturing the answers with his fingers. He looked sad when he couldn't read beyond two lines with one eye, and nothing with the other. That meant even his vision was poor.

When I glanced at his papers, his history said that he had been diagnosed with a cancer in his lymph nodes a couple of years back and was still undergoing treatment for the same. And now, from the looks of it, even his vision was receding. he didn't wear spectacles, so it had to be a recent development.

After knowing all this, I couldn't  bear to ask his father anything else. About whether he was hearing impaired since birth, since when and why was his vision receding, and how was he dealing with the cancer. How can one person have to deal with so many problems and that too so early on in their lives?

It scared the shit out of me. So I acted like a coward. I was too scared to find out what his life was like. I didn't want to know. I wouldn't have been able to bear it. So I didn't ask. I just politely sent him his way.

Hopefully I will learn better. But I have thought about him often after that.Which has obviously led to this post.

Then just a few days after that incident, I came across this quote put up in a frame inside my ENT department:

"I am just as deaf as I am blind. The problems of deafness are deeper and more complex, if not more important than those of blindness. Deafness is a much worse misfortune. For it means the loss of the most vital stimulus-- the sound of the voice that brings language, sets thoughts astir, and keeps us in the intellectual company of man.

Blindness separates us from things but deafness separates us from people."

- Hellen Keller.

While I had heard of Hellen Keller before this, I didn't really know her story very well. Researching that thought-provoking quote led me to read more about her. I am so glad that happened. Her story was one of the few truly inspiring ones I have read.

It also made me realize that the Hindi movie 'Black' must be inspired by her story. I just wish it hadn't starred Amitabh Bachchan (Yeah, I don't like him too much). Just watch this trailer and you'll see how similar the two movies must be if you've seen Black. Now I am going to watch the original movie.

Anyhow, so I am going to correct my lack of knowledge about hearing disabled people. Hopefully my post will make you want to do the same.

I guess I'll leave you now with all this food for thought. End of post.

Good night and good bye.

"The hospital experience"

I'm in love with hospitals! That's what I realized yesterday. I, love hospitals! I love almost everything about them. And I haven't even worked at or been to any of the high-end ones with modern, state-of-the-art facilities.

Hospitals are these huge systems, they're giant, well-coordinated machines. They work on well-oiled practices developed over the years. There's this camaraderie, this working relationship - friendly, good-natured, gossipy, but never invading others' privacy (well, at least not too much!), amongst everyone. From the doctors, the nurses, the patients, to the mamas, the canteen-wallas, the pharmacist, the store owners, there's this shared aura around everyone of having lived what I call, "the hospital experience".

There's glamor in almost anything associated with a hospital. At least to my mind's eye, there is. Though, I do understand that many of you might be disgusted by most of the things in a hospital. But I'm still at the stage where I feel like I'm an over-excited kid with his shiny new remote-controlled car (which for me is my hospital). There's this high I get from walking into a ward, and knowing I belong there, even if all I do is collect blood. As a student, I still wasn't quite part of the hospital, I was part of my college. So this is like a brand new world I've entered as an intern. And oh, it is so damn brilliant.

There are all these tiny little things that you can come across only in a hospital. There are beds in all the wards for the doctors and nurses to sleep in on their night shifts, and there are stoves to make chai in the mornings. Which other workplace has that? Then there are these washbasins with soap everywhere, because that becomes a basic necessity. There's a canteen/mess with all these doctors having meals at all odd hours of the day, either stuffing food before work, or tiredly gobbling something after. There are these humongous, slow-mo lifts, which are almost always overstuffed with patients. And there's always, always a temple in the complex. And it hosts poojas at regular intervals and every person on the premises gets prasad! Then there are always tons of forms to be filled everywhere, by both doctors, and patients. And yes, there is always, always, someone awake all night in a hospital!

I guess these are all the things I can remember right now. But there are more, I know. You can leave the ones you think of in the comments.

And then, of course, there are the patients. They're the biggest part of "the hospital experience". They come in all kinds and ages and varieties, each with his/her own story. They're fascinating, to say the least. If you take time to stop and notice them. Almost everyday, there's a great new story in the hospital.

I often imagine all the waiters and delivery boys in hotels surrounding any hospital would know it in and out, since they probably get tons of orders from the hungry people who are working at the hospital, especially in the night. Now imagine, you're a delivery boy working at a hotel, delivering food to people's boring doorsteps everyday, and then, one fine day you get an order for "Dr. So and So, Trauma Ward, OPD building, XYZ Hospital". Then you would go, apprehensively, with your parcel, and after much difficulty, when you reach the trauma ward, what do you find? A ward full of patients in various states of consciousness, blood spilled on the floor, most patients with lots of tubes attached to them, a lot of hustle and bustle and a lot of white all over the place...no one has the time or energy to even notice you. After few minutes of waiting, you would finally call out for the Doctor, and then he would materialize out of nowhere, in scrubs or in a white coat, and take the parcel from you. Now tell me, wouldn't you (the delivery boy) be in awe? Wouldn't you? I totally would. I would go home and tell my family this brilliant story, it would be the highlight of my day. I would have been part of "the hospital experience", even if for a few minutes.

In hospitals, there's always an unspoken protocol to be followed. Hospitals work, no, thrive, on hierarchy. Everyone is answerable to someone, everyone has someone whose orders they have to blindly follow, no questions asked. The interns are, of course, on the lowest rung of the hierarchy. We do the most menial and the least skilled medical work, have to suck up to everyone else, listen to and/or laugh at their mostly bad jokes, and tread carefully everywhere we go. Insult a senior, and you're doomed. Insult a nurse, and you're beyond doomed. That's the way things work. Don't disturb your senior unless it's an emergency. Don't order the nurse around. Don't shout at the mama. Wish them all good morning with a smile when you come in, and your day should go by noticeably smoother, trust me.

As you can see, living "the hospital experience" teaches you a lot of things, both medical and non-medical.

Well, this post has basically become a prolonged, disconnected, ramble. Suffice to say, I am living and loving my "hospital experience" to the fullest these days, and I have developed a writers' block as well. But I needed to post this. Maybe I will rework it later on.

As of now, I hereby end it abruptly.

Do let me know how you are living up your "hospital experience"?